Honestly my last year is been going so well that I regularly feel a little guilty. Little one is growing fast, house build is finally starting, job is everything I could want it to be, relationships are best they've ever been (even have one more), and I now have a new close friends group who are very much like minded. Everything is so great that I haven't had time for social media, which is probably a good thing. How are you? How well did you survive this last year?
You understand those empty spaces.
You know what belongs in those places
The connections we had still have traces,
while we walk around in solemn stasis.
So from here to there, and from me to you
You're not alone, together we see this through.
The loss of contact we today will rue
But outlast it all, and these connections will renew.
What I miss is simple as such;
that plain and simple person's _____.
What I want to ask isn't too much,
it's not near complicated as a brunch.
I may give up and lay on the rug,
so wake me up, give my arm a tug.
cause the respite I need is just a ___,
and maybe a little coffee in my mug.
It may be summer but I still feel cold.
On this distancing, I'm not fully sold.
Could I ask and be so bold,
for just a minute a hand to ____.
Hey friend, how are you doing? When my state said they'd be sending respirators over to NY I thought of you and figured I'd check in and make sure youre doing okay. Is there anything you need?
It was just cuddling for like 8 hours and that WAS AMAZING!!
All the rest was a totally different bonus :)
well it started that way... for the first several hours... then people got more comfortable with each other and more in the mood as the morning came.
Try enjoying the ride instead of expecting the end.
Maybe she'll change her mind, maybe she'll find someone to be monogamous with and have to say goodbye, but your anxiety about either potential outcome is irrelevant.
You made a connection, appreciate it for what it is today.
almost never anymore. I quit the traveling job so I don't get around the country nearly as much as I used to. I'm pretty happy to be building my home and family in the Pacific Northwest
Yes this, so much this.
I'm not solo poly by chance, I just happened to find myself while I was alone for a while, and I've cherished that relationship ever since.
Also, if you need help collecting data, consider me a volunteer, I have a Master's in that now (maybe I do: waiting on thesis review for another couple weeks)
Intentionally creating distance in general while still holding outo the most important pieces is how I overcame this type of jealousy. It wasn't easy, but lots of communication and focusing on the most important parts of our relationship allowed me to grow and our bond to solidify into something better.
I had to become a complete, stand alone individual before I could stop feeling alone when my partner left for another. Been maried a decade now, and we've never been happier.
I don't know you well yet, but I can tell you my story of a similar hardship.
I used to use the term "sharing" and thought the same way, that I was using it to describe time, but I was actually using it to describe a level of attention I thought I was losing out on. The difference is hardly noticable, but when I look back on it I realize I had become cognitively codependent, I had a hard time describing myself as an individual.
The best advise I can share is to 1: stop thinking of it as "sharing" and 2: stay occupied when your partner is out an you are not. Social events, gym, friends, work, hobbies, hell even an immersive video game. That way you don't dwell and start an emotional feedback loop (yeah I've been guilty of that).
And hey, you're not alone
Poly people seem to understand immediately. Other people I just explain that I don't limit where a relationship will naturally grow. Generally people appreciate that. (Though PDX is much different than NYC)
Bi-poly Accountant/ Analyst/ Consultant/ IT/ Tax
I'm so poly I can't even pick just one career.
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